I’m Fluent in Teenage-ese

I love the movie “10 Things I Hate About You”. In fact, my Aunt Sara and I can put the movie on mute and pretty much recite the whole darn thing. I have many favorite parts, but lately one has been sticking out in my mind.

For those of you not familiar with the flick, shame on you. However, I will overlook it and catch you up to the quote that cracks me up. Bianca Stratford can’t date until her socially inept older sister, Kat, does. Kat doesn’t care about dating and has an interesting detest for the opposite sex in general. Binaca is starving for a social life and has convinced Kat to go out with a guy a couple times so Bianca could be her natural self, a social butterfly. So, Bianca wants to go to prom, but Kat is against the whole thing and refuses to go. Bianca pleads to her father, who is an OBGYN and never lets the girls forget it, to let her go without Kat. Now, you are caught up to the conversation that has had me giggling on the inside for the past couple of days.

Walter Stratford: Do you know what happens at proms?
Bianca: Yes, we’ll dance, we’ll kiss, we’ll come home. It’s not quite the crisis situation you imagine.
Walter Stratford: Kissing? That what you think happens? I’ve got news for you. Kissing isn’t what keeps me up to my elbows in placenta all day long.
Bianca: Can we, for two seconds, ignore the fact that you’re severely unhinged and discuss my need for a night of teenage normalcy?
Walter Stratford: What’s normal? Those darn . . . Dawson’s river kids sleeping in each other’s beds and what not?
Bianca: Daddy, that is so not . . .
Walter Stratford: I’ve got news for you. I’m down, I’ve got the 411, and you’re not going out and getting jiggy with some boy, I don’t care how dope his ride is. Momma didn’t raise no fool.

At this point Bianca is completely frsutrated with her father and storms off.

So, Walter, I too am down. I know that when I see “Spencers” written on my grocery list that I need to get bananas. I know that when my kids ask to “spover” at a friend’s, that they need to pack a toothbrush and clean clothes. I m gud @ txtin’ 2 let kids know, ‘u r l8!’ and other similar phrases. When Colleen and Cameron see a ‘big bird’ they think that Greg and I are being too affectionate. As if!

I may have become my parents in thinking that my kids’ music is ‘just noise’ and wonder how they can understand anything the artist is singing, or be repeating the same things my parents did when I was a teen;”did you brush your teeth? are you wearing deoderant? what time will you be home? who are you going to be with? will there be adults there? remember who you are! where are your manners?” etc. But I am grateful that when I am a bit confused with what is going on in my own home to the spawn I created and am raising to someday become me (ha, ha, ha!) that they are willing to catch me up. Keep me down with the 411 and whatnot. I love that they aren’t embarrassed of me and still invite friends to come over. So I can show off my sick conversing skills. 🙂